Where is D.B. Cooper? Why does ambrosia salad exist? Who was the serial pooper of Akron, OH?

In a thousand years, historians might look back and ponder another similarly confounding mystery: “How did Wine Spies put together such a magnificent collection of 12 wines at astonishingly low prices?!”

Deep connections. Advanced mind control tactics. Bargaining strategies rivaling the best hostage negotiators. But you already knew that. And best of all, you won’t need to shovel anything off your lawn, assume a new identity, or choke down an ungodly combination of fruit, marshmallows, and gelatin.

In case you haven’t figured it out by now, MYSTERY CASES ARE BACK ON THE MENU!

If you’re getting this email, chances are you enjoy wine. And if you enjoy wine, you ALWAYS need a good stash of cellar defenders.

Enter, the Quaffers.

Reliable and terrifyingly easy to drink. You’ll get a case with ALL REDS - 12 absolute gems ready for maximum enjoyment. Throw in the sweet taste of victory when you pocket $300+ and we have a total no-brainer!!

For those Ops who want to level up, we have two more options:

The Connoisseur: is for the discerning Operatives who want the prime values, no compromise on quality, and a caviar taste on a line-caught tuna, sustainably-harvested tuna budget. You’ll get a mixed case of 12 top shelf gems. Drink some now, save some for later, or just throw a rager and pop all 12 with friends!

The Collector comes fully armed to the tilt with howitzer Cabs, mammoth Tuscans, and prestigious Bordeaux! Big names, big scores, and (usually) big price tags. Expect eclectic treasures from Caberlot, Catena, Beauséjour Duffau, Espectacle, and Seña. Normally you’d pay an arm and a leg, and, in the 1800s, one or two healthy children for all these, but not here, not today! To be more exact, this contains near $1500 worth of wine.

Since we’ve only grown since the last time we did this, you can bet your bunghole we’re loading them up with some really good stuff.

We scoured the furthest reaches of the warehouse to uncover this plethora of vinous delights. Then spent far too many expletive-filled hours crunching the numbers in excel to make it happen.

Here’s what you need to know:

🍷 We’ll have three tiers of mystery cases: the $299 Quaffers, the $499 Connoisseurs, and the $699 Collectors.

🍷 Each case is jam packed with our favorite deals. ALL REDS! No white wines in this, sorry.

🍷 IMPORTANT: when checking out, please select “single order” so the mystery case does not add to your Locker. That way it will not count toward your 24 bottle Locker limit and it will not trigger an auto-ship on any existing filled Lockers you have.

🍷 We dropped some hints, and a few clearly unredacted pieces of intel on this, but you won’t know what’s inside the Mystery Case until it lands on your doorstep. Whatever your personal mystery picks will be, deliciousness and value are guaranteed, and possibly you’ll discover a new favorite. With discounts averaging way over 50% OFF in each case, delivered free to your doorstep.

Finally, it goes without saying, but these are SUPER LIMITED!!

Roughly 50 cases of each, so stake your claim.

Once each tier sells out, we’ll move to the next one up, until they’re ALL gone, and ooh they always do.

You’re still here? Great, because we’d love to have you in the private Facebook group to share your discoveries once they land on your doorstep.